Brian - TearablePuns

Rented a Limousine

I rented a limousine

I rented a limousine but there was no driver.
I can’t believe I spent that money and have nothing to chauffeur it.

Origami never creases to amaze me.

I thought about the most strict, but also most beautiful teacher I had.
She was hard on the pupils, but easy on the eyes.

Furniture Makers

News from the furniture maker’s convention:
the chair recognized the bureau but tabled discussion for later.

I’m writing a story about a very small garden.
Not much of a plot.

I tried to have a conversation with the garbage man,
but all he did was talk trash.

Banking or accountancy

Banking or accountancy,
what accrual way to make a living.

new paper

I‘m naming a new paper.
It’s the best quality available: “Ream of the crop.”

I could never be an artist.

I could never be an artist.
All I have ever been able to draw is a crowd.

making false teeth

I had a job making false teeth.
It didn’t pay anything. They wanted indentured workers.