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TearablePuns

TearablePuns

Ripping Funny Puns, Jokes, and One Liners!

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Tag: puns

Posted on September 18, 2013January 31, 2021

I dyed my hair today.

I dyed my hair today

I dyed my hair today.
It was the highlight of the week.

Posted on September 6, 2013January 31, 2021

If you deceive people about your lack of hair

If you deceive people about your lack of hair

If you deceive people about your lack of hair,
there will be hell toupee.

Posted on September 5, 2013January 31, 2021

You can’t escape being a peasant

You can't escape being a peasant

You can’t escape being a peasant
because resistance is feudal.

Posted on September 4, 2013January 31, 2021

Jewish New Year!

Jewish New Year

Jewish New Year:
Shofar, so good.
Happy Rosh Hashannah!

Posted on September 3, 2013January 31, 2021

I typically avoid funerals

I typically avoid funerals

I typically avoid funerals
because I’m not a mourning person.

Posted on September 3, 2013January 31, 2021

Don’t believe what you hear about fleas and ticks

Don't believe what you hear about fleas and ticks

Don’t believe what you hear about fleas and ticks
it’s all lice!

Posted on August 19, 2013January 31, 2021

The thought of losing the pandas

The thought of losing the pandas

The thought of losing the pandas
is just unbearable.

Posted on August 17, 2013January 31, 2021

I would’ve kept sewing

I would’ve kept sewing

I would’ve kept sewing,
but I was exhausted and ran out of steam.

Posted on August 16, 2013January 31, 2021

I was in court today with the airline over missing luggage.

I was in court today with the airline over missing luggage

I was in court today with the airline over missing luggage.
They lost the case.

Posted on August 15, 2013January 31, 2021

My doctor told me to cut down on sodium

My doctor told me to cut down on sodium

My doctor told me to cut down on sodium,
but I’m taking his advice with a pinch of salt.

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