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Posted on February 22, 2021February 7, 2021

Making False Teeth

making false teeth

I had a job making false teeth.
It didn’t pay anything. They wanted indentured workers.

Posted on February 19, 2021February 7, 2021

Glass-blowing Class

a glass-blowing class

I took a glass-blowing class but I inhaled.
Now, I have a pane inside.

Posted on February 18, 2021February 7, 2021

I Shouldn’t Subscribe

I shouldn't subscribe

I shouldn’t subscribe to any magazines.
I only read them periodically.

But you should subscribe to puns by email!

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Posted on February 17, 2021February 7, 2021

The Cat’s Dish

The Cat's Dish

Her: Have you seen the cat’s dish?
Me: No, but I’ve seen the fish gossip.

Posted on February 16, 2021February 7, 2021

Budget Talks

Budget Talks

With all the budget talks going on,
I can’t help but wonder what the Department of Corrections must spend on White Out.

Posted on February 13, 2021February 7, 2021

My Dry Cleaners

My dry cleaners

My dry cleaners are skirting the pressing need for material profits.
I told them it will result in de-pleated assets and they may have to clothes their doors.

Posted on February 12, 2021February 7, 2021

Snopes is hiring

Snopes is hiring

I’ve heard Snopes is hiring spoof-readers.
(I haven’t fact-checked this)

Posted on February 11, 2021February 7, 2021

Local Condiment Company

My local condiment company started outsaucing.

My local condiment company started outsaucing.

Posted on February 10, 2021February 10, 2021

Pole-Vaulter

pole-vaulter

I just met a guy carrying a long pole.
I asked, “Are you a pole-vaulter?”
He said, “No, I’m German – but how did you know my name is Walter?”

Posted on February 9, 2021February 7, 2021

Some think my puns are not for children

Some think my puns are not for children

Some think my puns are not for children,
but only groan-ups.

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