You can never explain a good pun to a kleptomaniac
because they always take things literally.
Tennis players can never find happiness.
Tennis players can never find happiness.
Love means nothing to them.
Hey, are you made of Copper and Tellurium?
Hey, are you made of Copper and Tellurium?
‘Cause you are CuTe.
C, E Flat, and G walk into a bar
C, E Flat, and G walk into a bar.
The bartender says, “Sorry, no minors.”
What do you need when you’re dehydrated?
What do you need when you’re dehydrated?
A thirst aid kit!
How do you comfort a grammar nazi?
How do you comfort a grammar nazi?
Say, “there, their, they’re.”
You’re prettier than the Venus de Milo
“You’re prettier than the Venus de Milo,”
he said disarmingly.
I tried to make a belt out of watches
I tried to make a belt out of watches,
but it was a waist of time.
The fellows carrying the casket
The fellows carrying the casket
at the pharmacist’s funeral could be called pill bearers.
Did you hear about the guy who told that awful pun?
Did you hear about the guy who told that awful pun?
Yeah, he was punished.