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TearablePuns

TearablePuns

Ripping Funny Puns, Jokes, and One Liners!

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Tag: funny puns

Posted on October 4, 2012February 1, 2021

The man who fell into an upholstery machine

The man who fell into an upholstery machine

The man who fell into an upholstery machine
is now fully recovered.

Posted on October 3, 2012February 1, 2021

The butcher backed into the meat grinder

The butcher backed into the meat grinder

The butcher backed into the meat grinder
and got a little behind in his work.

Posted on October 3, 2012February 1, 2021

The best way to communicate with a fish

The best way to communicate with a fish

The best way to communicate with a fish
is to drop them a line.

Posted on October 2, 2012February 1, 2021

Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft

Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft

Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft
and I’ll show you A-flat minor.

Posted on October 2, 2012February 1, 2021

She was only a whiskey-maker’s daughter

She was only a whiskey-maker's daughter

She was only a whiskey-maker’s daughter,
but he loved her still.

Posted on October 1, 2012February 1, 2021

She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg

She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg

She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg,
but he broke it off!

Posted on October 1, 2012February 1, 2021

Sea captains

Sea captains  don't like crew cuts.

Sea captains
don’t like crew cuts.

Posted on September 27, 2012February 1, 2021

No matter how much you push the envelope

No matter how much you push the envelope

No matter how much you push the envelope,
it will still be stationery.

Posted on September 27, 2012February 1, 2021

I used to work in a blanket factory

I used to work in a blanket factory

I used to work in a blanket factory,
but it folded.

Posted on September 26, 2012February 1, 2021

I wanted an optometrist from the Alaskan islands

I wanted an optometrist from the Alaskan islands

I wanted an optometrist from the Alaskan islands,
but I got an optical Aleutian.

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